Hangman Page took to social media this afternoon to situation a hilarious press release to AEW followers concerning what occurred this weekend and what’s going to happen going ahead:
“HANGMAN” ADAM PAGE SHARES HIS THOUGHTS AFTER BEING CROWNED ALL ELITE WRESTLING WORLD CHAMPION AT FULL GEAR
After celebrating his championship win over Kenny Omega at AEW Full Gear by sharing seventeen orders of child again ribs from Chili’s with the Dark Order, answering seventy-four congratulatory textual content messages and two asking to get them booked on Dark, and obnoxiously loud night breathing his approach by means of two early morning Delta airways flights residence, “Hangman” Adam Page has determined to share his ideas about and intentions as AEW World Champion
• “Hangman Adam Page is declaring this Wednesday, November 17, as the first National Cowboy Sh*t Day* with celebrations live from his home state of Virginia this week on Dynamite.
• “Hangman” Adam Page will continue to increase his strength and cardiovascular training, add additional dynamic and static stretching to his routine to limber out his rigid frame, and study the vegan diet to prepare for the number one contender Bryan Danielson. As champion, “Hangman” Adam Page will welcome all other challengers as AEW sees fit, but please God don’t make him fight Wardlow and his big muscle t*ts again.
• After seeing the unofficial, unauthorized, and most brilliant display of “I do not give a sh*t about copyright,” “The Good, The Bad, and The Elite” series on YouTube, “Hangman Adam Page will use his new leverage as champion to get that man a job or on the very least a pleasant letter and fruit basket.
• With the bonus cost that comes with successful the AEW World Championship, “Hangman Adam Page will trade in his gas-guzzling truck for an electric vehicle in an effort to reduce planet-warming emissions and encourage others to make the switch when they see how badass it looks with steer horns mounted on the front or whatever.
• “Hangman Adam Page wish to ship a real and heartfelt thanks to the numerous followers that by no means gave up on him, even when he gave them each cause to. They’ve helped him accomplish greater than he had ever imagined.
If you wish to hear extra of “Hangman” Adam Page’s ideas on his latest championship win, “tell them I ain’t doing anymore of those podcasts as long as I live, you think I wanna be on the don and dookie youtube show or whatever yeah right get a clue, I’m champion now I got so much sh*t to do I’m already so stressed.”
* Pending approval from the National Day Archives, which I actually doubt goes to occur since their final correspondence merely mentioned “Stop emailing us about this.”
Hangman Page will have fun his AEW Championship victory on Dynamite
This Wednesday’s episode of AEW Dynamite ought to show to be very fascinating as we won’t solely hear from Hangman Page, however hopefully The Young Bucks as properly who gave Page the approving nod to hit Kenny Omega with the Buckshot Lariat to seize the championship.
What will occur this Wednesday evening on AEW Dynamite with Hangman Page main the cost? Tune in to search out out.
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Q. Will you be celebrating “National Cowboy Sh*t Day” on November 17?